CHAOS

State of mind and heart

Fucked in a way perfect in another

She couldn’t really put her thoughts and feelings together

Disrupted in all ways possible

Nothing could be controlled anymore

She could hear thoughts cry for justice and  could feel her heart bleeding out

She needed to save herself from all this but had no idea of where or how to start

Her mind and heart all too weak to carry this kind of baggage

How could she explain her pain yet she didn’t understand it

She felt like she was trapped in this dark place with no hope of ever seeing the light againShe was suffocating every single second and it scared the hell out of her

The hardest part of her chaotic state was pretending to be okay to the outside world, even those close to her

The pretense was draining and she had no energy left to fake it 

But at the end of the day she had to put on a smile and fake her laughter just for the world to believe she was okay.